This morning I spent a lot of time out with the shining Sun.
And finally it’s time to say bye.
I welcomed darkness with a cup of coffee.
It’s warm vapour fought cold inside me.
I heard the coffee shop guy whispering some old hymn in a varying tone .
And My body started vibrating when the cool breeze carrying cold and love embraced me.
My whole body enjoyed it, but…..
I noticed that my eyes was running here and there
Maybe searching someone who isn’t there.
Slowly those pieces of memories joined together.
All my senses maybe more than that started to have same feeling.
These shameless sensors of mine is looking for that girl again.
Yeah ! You are right.. I want to know…
More than that stupid curiosity to find her again my heart is full of some sort of eagerness…
Or anxiety…
What happened to her these days?
We had many cup of coffees together.
Sitting in opposite tables to be precise.
She never threw a smile at me… Not even a glance on my face…
I am none to her, yes I agree.
And also She is none to me …
Though her absence these days took my peace away.
She was short as her attitude.
And Rich as much as she is chubby.
Her left eyebrow was pierced with studs.
Her lips was dark as a night without moon.
Deserted dry eyes was always half opened.
Her shoes was tied up tight as if it is stuck.
She had a careless hairstyle.
Have she ever combed it properly?
It was always messed up just like her life.
Fate gifted her something she won’t be able to fit in with.
I never got a chance to hear from her.
Her lips never opened except for cigars.
It’s smoke covered her sight as a refuge,
And it successfully made a wall between us…
Is that she always wanted?
I never had a talk with her but…
Now her figure is damn familiar with me.
I used to smile at her .
What was I even thinking?
Hoping for a friendship?
Ah! Maybe I wished that I may get strange friend with some strange feelings.
Lost in my memories, that cool breeze continued to strike at me.
As if it want me to look away…
So that I won’t see that girl with a red cardigan sitting on the spot she used to sit….
Evenings passed.
I had many coffees all alone.
This and that always reminded me she isn’t there anymore.
I looked for her Though I knew I will never meet her again.
She vanished away without leaving any traces…
Until that day I was really confused .
I had hundreds of questions passing through myself.
But that day , when I was taking a short break from my work ,in front of my office ..
In middle of the day when I was simply staring through vehicles passed in front of me,
I saw her Face.
Looking bit more messy than it used to be…
What???
I was stuck for a moment…
She is looking this way …
None is there except me..
Yeah she is looking at me…
I’m supposed to be happy.
But I couldn’t.
Her eyes, I felt like it is screaming loud in its own language…
How can someone’s eyes can be this sad?
What was it telling?
Is that because her life got worse?
Is that because she couldn’t chose me ?
Is that because though she wanted to run over to my side she couldn’t do that???
Seeing her again didn’t sorted my thoughts out…
Now I think about her more than usual….
Now I look for her more desperately…
Maybe not for a strange friendship but to be there for her….
I wish one day I meet her again
Poems of Philip 